Best Week Ever has been deeply involved in the investigation wether Michael Phelps is a Douche. Let me be very clear. The answer is Yes and "special". I don't need to look at any pictures or hear any interviews. The fact that he won 8 gold medals in the sport of swimming tells me everything I need to know. As a deprogrammed swimmer, I can tell you that the sport lends itself to creating grade A Douchebags. You wouldn't think it, but as you get deeper into the sport and devote more time to the boring painfully solitary sport, you become more and more douchey. It just comes with the territory. I can't really explain it. I think it has to do with the fact that you have to devote such an insane amount of time to a sport where you are in close proximity to barely clothed females, rarely get to hook up (Although many world class athletes/ swimmers masturbate or have sex right before a race to relax- I swear this is true), and deny yourself the freedom of a normal life. The result is a competitive cockiness immersed in a lack of social communication coupled with an incredible amount of "wannabe". Just like the service industry workers, swimmers slowly replace the world around them and the people closest to them with fellow swimmers and swimmer lifestyle. ( I am sure that makes no sense to anyone) What they think is interesting and cool is actually painfully boring and stupid. The problem is that that they are confident in what they do and how they live. Believe me, its a horrible life. Michael Phelps looks to be a dorky loser that has gained confidence through success in the sport. This creates the most vile and intolerable species of douche. This will only become more clear as he appear more and more in the gossip columns. Plus he's retarded right?
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